While waiting for exam results, a young person will likely be going through a range of emotions and – without a conversational outlet – bottling them up. Encourage open conversation in which they can express these emotions. Openly talking about hopes and fears and acknowledging feelings of worry, failure, disappointment, and related pressures will help. This will help to build resilience, reaffirm trust and foster confidence about the future for your young person.

Remember, some young people might prefer to communicate by other means, such as through writing or art. Don’t discount these methods as not being communicative! If the young person in your care feels more confident expressing themselves in this way, make sure to create opportunities that enable this, like going to a café or the cinema together.

Ask open questions, such as:

Verbally reassure them of your love and support with phrases like:

Even if you can’t be physically present all the time, ensure the young person knows you’re available if they need you. If you’re working but have access to your phone at certain times, let them know when your breaks are and that you’ll keep your phone on you during these times so if they want to text or ring you, they can. If you can’t access your phone, let them know what time you’ll be home or suggest another trusted adult who they could talk to.

Ask if the young person in your care would like to do anything in particular on the day or evening before exam results. Come up with a list of suggestions you think they’d like – they may be too distracted and stressed to think of things on their own. Here are some examples of activities you could do:

Every young person will be different in how they handle exam results stress, so don’t be too worried if the young person in your care declines any offer of activities. They may just deal with stress better by not making a fuss about it or by sitting quietly watching YouTube or passing time playing their favourite game online with friends. Let them take the lead.

Again, keep encouraging open dialogue by being as present as possible, asking open questions and giving plenty of time to listen.

If the results weren’t what the young person wanted, emphasise during conversation that this is not the be-all-end-all for their future. Plenty of people go on to have great careers and happy lives without having achieved academic success at school.

If exam results day didn’t bring the results they were hoping for, ask the young person in your care if they’d like to discuss other options and next steps. For example, if they need to repeat exams or an assessment, how would they go about that? Or is there an alternative path they would like to consider?

If they don’t want to talk about it at the time, reassure them that you’ll be there to talk about it when they’re ready. Remember, they might not actually know what they want to do, so you can also offer to research ideas with them. Ask their school if there’s a career advisor available to speak to.

Watch out for the following signs that may indicate your child or young person is not coping, particularly if they received results that they were unhappy with.