The Digital Illusion: Addressing Loneliness in a Screen-First World

Reading Time: 5.2 mins

Published: June 12, 2025

Loneliness is a difficult emotion to face and most people experience it at some point in their lives. Despite being surrounded by so-called connections and followers, it is often only screen deep and can leave many feeling unfulfilled when it comes to their real-world lives. This can be especially difficult for children and young people as they are already navigating a stage of life that can present many challenges.

Although it is normal to feel lonely, a young person experiencing it might feel that there is something wrong with them or that it is their own fault. It is important to spot the signs and support a young person who is feeling lonely, even if they seem to regularly be surrounded by other people.

For children and young people, feeling lonely can happen when:

They aren’t being fully understood or adequately acknowledged by those around them.
They feel different from others around them, like they don’t fit in or belong anywhere.
They move a lot which stops them from building friendships.
They are being bullied.
They are a child with SEND (Special Education Needs and Disabilities).
They are being excluded or left out.
They are living in care.
They don’t get on with their family.
They are living with a long-term health condition or disability.

The relationships in their life are unfulfilling or break down.
They are lacking a wider social circle of friends.
There are special events or holidays such as Valentines Day, Christmas or New Years Eve.
They are beginning a new chapter, such as starting a new school or moving to university.
Their parents separate or divorce.
One or both of their parents are absent.
They are struggling with their gender or sexual identity.
They have lost someone close to them.
They don’t have the money to take part in plans that other children can afford.

Although there may be specific reasons for feeling lonely, it can also be for no reason at all. Loneliness itself is not a mental health condition, but it can significantly change how you feel and lead to mental health conditions such as depression.

A 2023 global study found that 25% of young people aged between 15 and 18 years old feel “very lonely” or “fairly lonely”.

Source: GALLUP

Loneliness can look and feel different to everyone, but there are some signs you can look out for that might indicate a child is feeling lonely*:

Avoiding talking about friends.
Being quiet or withdrawn.
Seeking attention by misbehaving.
Staying in their room for long periods of time.
Appearing sad for no obvious reason.
Not socialising outside of school.
No longer spending time with friends that they usually would.
Loss of appetite.
Using their devices a lot more than usual for activities, such as social media or gaming.

*Please note, this is not a diagnostic checklist and if you are concerned about the mental health of a child in your care, it is important to reach out to a medical professional.

Wider Impact

Being lonely or isolated can make children more vulnerable to various harms such as grooming, radicalisation and abuse. According to Action for Children, chronically lonely children are at greater risk of becoming victims of child sexual exploitation as they are less likely to be able to identify the differences between genuine interactions and relationships, and behaviour that is manipulative, coercive or abusive.

Additionally, studies have found that loneliness in childhood has been associated with future mental health problems, such as depression, up to 9 years later.

What Can You Do?

If you suspect that a child in your care is lonely, it is important to address it sensitively as they may be hesitant to open up about how they are feeling.

Have Open Conversations

Ask them how they’re feeling and try to understand them. Approach them in a casual setting that is judgement free, asking them open-ended questions like “Have you been feeling ok recently?”, or “Has something been making you feel down?”. This will allow them space to talk about their feelings.

Listen Intently

Once you ask them a question, don’t interrupt them. Give them time to get their words together and sit in silence for a second if they are thinking of what to say. Seek to understand how they feel, rather than provide an immediate solution. You could even repeat back what they have said to ensure you understand them fully and to show you are listening.

Explain What Loneliness Is

If a child expresses that they are feeling lonely or it sounds like they are, check with them that they understand what loneliness is. Do they know a lot of people can feel like this? Do they know that it’s not their fault? Ask them if they have any questions about the emotion.

Reassure them

Tell them that loneliness is a temporary feeling that many people experience, and that although they feel lonely, they are not alone. Do not dismiss their feelings by saying things like “you’re being dramatic”, or “it’s because you’re too quiet”. Never place blame on them. Instead, validate their feelings and ensure they know you are always there if they need to talk. Reinforce the message that how they are feeling is temporary and won’t last forever.

Be Supportive

Ensure the child in your care knows who their trusted adults are who they can go to if they continue to struggle with loneliness or their feelings get worse. If it continues for too long or manifests into a mental health problem, seek out mental health support from a medical professional.

Make a Plan

If there is a reason for them feeling lonely, agree on what they can do to help. Some ideas you can suggest are:

Taking part in a new hobby.
Joining an after-school club.
Helping them practice social interactions.
Looking for friendships through activities they enjoy. For example, if they enjoy gaming, look for a local gaming club or an online group where they can make friends.
Childline run message boards that can offer a safe space for children and young people to ask their peers for advice and get support.

Further Resources

Join our Safeguarding Hub Newsletter Network

Members of our network receive weekly updates on the trends, risks and threats to children and young people online.

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Who are your Trusted Adults?

The Trusted Adult video explains who young people might speak to and includes examples of trusted adults, charities and organisations.

Watch Video on Vimeo

Discussing Online Life With Your Child

Use our video for guidance and advice around constructing conversations about the online world with the children in your care.

watch on Vimeo